I have waited quite a while to post this blog. Saved in my drafts for the past several months, I’m sharing it now. Partially because my pregnancy was a secret for 14 weeks, partially because I haven’t been as invested in writing lately. However, I feel like I’m ready to share again. So, here we go-

How perfect.. This is Chapter 10, our wedding date is the 10th, and today I found out I was pregnant, on 10DPO.

Very similar to my last pregnancy, I saw the thick test line and not much more as I finished peeing and grabbed the pregnancy test. As I grabbed it and stared at it, there it was.. the slightest little line forming. Tears streamed down my face as I closed my eyes and thanked God over and over.

I didn’t know how I was going to feel when I found out I was pregnant again. I have been nervous about not allowing myself to feel excited, because I didn’t know what could happen or how I would feel. However, excitement and love is all I feel! I have managed to keep the secret from everyone, except my best friend, Sydney. I plan to tell Trent tonight before we head to my work company dinner, where thankfully, alcohol will not be served!

Because I am who I am, I took a pregnancy test at home this morning, and then brought a different test brand to work to see if the results were the same. Thankfully, they were! A little line appeared on that test as well. I now have the test in my drawer until I go home to tell Trent after work. Every so often, I open my drawer and stare at it. What I would have given last cycle to see that little line appear. But we have trusted in God’s timing. Thank you, God and our angel baby in heaven. I know the two of you sent us this rainbow baby. ♥

However, I do have thoughts of our first baby, Elliott. I think about how far along I would be with her and I start to feel guilt for having excitement over another baby. But I know Elliott will always be apart of our family and Trent and I will always keep her spirit alive.

-Kenz (Mommy of an angel and rainbow baby)